I'm Not quite dead yet...

but I may smell like it, look like it and definitely feel like it...but I promise I am still breathing. Barely. Very loudly and heavily.  Ohmygoodness!  Softball is kicking my butt!! I mean, I still love it, but wow I didn't realize just how out of shape I am.  Or maybe I did but now reality is setting in...I knew that I had gained weight, I attributed that to the fact that I quit smoking. 

We had another double header last night.  We lost the first game and won the second. Woohoo!  I was sweating so profusely that it literally looked like I had been caught outside in the rain.  I don't like to sweat that much. boo.  Oh, and have I mentioned that it is like sweltering hot here??  I am talking Africa HOT!  The heat + me trying to run = disasterous.  It is seriously such a joke that the other team was calling out which ever base I was going to as the "easy out".  Sadness. But it is okay because when I did get on base I actually got ALL the way around and scored!! WooHoo! Go me! lol.  Yeah and I hate running with a passion...my knee is only slightly hurting today after an unfortunate clumsy almost fall. hehe. I rolled my ankle going after a ball and somehow twisted my knee. Ouch.

All in all it was good...no one had to drag my carcass off the field, no one had to call an ambulance, my husband still smelled worse than me (barely), and we won the last game (so what if it was only by one point).

Exercise

I found my preferred method....I already knew it, I just had lost it for about 15 years or so lol.  Softball!! We have been playing coed church league softball.  Notice the "we", hubby had been playing church league for years and they FINALLY got a coed team!! Yay!  I love softball!!  Saturday we played in a benefit tournament and wound up playing 4 games back to back in the pouring rain.  It was great.  I was so sore I was hobbling around like an old lady for 3 days...just in time for our league to start and for us to play a double header on Tuesday night.  Thankfully I am not sore any longer...because tonight we have another double header!  I have only had some minor injuries and have found that I can still play fairly well.  I have never been a super star but I can hit and I can catch and I don't look like a complete idiot out there so I guess that is all that matters.  Well, that and the fact that I am having tons of fun despite the soreness, injuries, and the fact that it is almost unbearably hot outside.  Maybe since I will stick with this unlike the running idea, I can lose some of the weight I want gone.  Oh and as of right now my OBP (on base percentage for you non baseball people) is 600!! yay me!!

now I remember

 I actually remembered to go to the track for my running "program".  I was even early. Go me!  There were about 20 other people there.  Some of them I knew, some of them actually spoke to me, and some of them tried to act like I didn't exist. Haha.  It may have something to do with the fact that I was wearing one of my husband's old t-shirts, it is extra comfy, has the sleeves cut out of it, and is a band t-shirt..oh, did I mention the band's name is Earth Orgy? lol. The looks I got were awesome, it was almost as if I showed up wearing nothing but a smile.  I did not do much smiling while I was at the track.  Not only were there people there acting like I was the devil or didn't exist, but there were teenagers there who pretty much were embarassed by all of the "old" fat adults.  We did some stretches before we started running.  Stretches that make me feel and look like a flailing elephant.  I remember why I don't run, not because I can't, but simply because I HATE running....I remembered about three laps in.  The thing is I can't quit, then I would be a quitter plus I paid money to do this crap! Maybe next time won't be as bad.  Oh and as a side note, my legs and buttocks were killing me by the time I got home, so maybe, just maybe, it will help me to lose my fatty status.

Epic Fail...

And so it begins...I lose.  My first day of my new running program and I FORGOT to go!! In my defense we got our pool set up and finally got to go swimming and I was so sooper stoked that time got away from me and oops I skipped first night of the program.  Lets hope I do better on the second night.

The journey begins...

well, actually I just wrote the check that pays for the journey, but it is essentially the same thing.  Starting next week I will be participating in a Couch to 5k program, hopefully it won't be as scary as it sounds.  I am not a runner, have never ran, and pretty much have always said, " The only way you will see me run is if someone or a snake is chasing me."  I don't even know if snakes chase people but that is neither here nor there.  I have decided that instead of complaining to my husband about the 30!! pounds I have gained in the last year and a half, I am going to do something about it.  I still say that I gained this weight from quitting smoking when we started dating and there are days that I have seriously contemplated smoking again just to see if I am right.  I am not ruling it out either.  I changed my eating habits, some days I barely even eat anything (yeah yeah I know it is bad for me) and I still don't lose weight.  OR I lose 5 lbs and gain back 6!!  It is really getting annoying.  I figure that a couple of things can happen with this running project...either I can lose some weight and get in great shape, I can stay a Fatty and people will laugh and call me names while I try to run, or I will die.  Hey, there are no guarantees...I am excited and scared at the same time.  I have found no one who will join the program with me, so I have no back up and no friend to chat with while there.  I am terrified that I am going to show up at the track the first night and there is going to be a group of super thin athletes in their super cute running clothes who are just waiting to point and laugh.  But they don't know that I have Robot Blood and I can take away all of their powers and give them to the Aliens....mwahahaha...at least that is what my friend Christopher told me, so what if he is only three, he thinks I am kinda cool.